Archive | Contemplations

Lie Down Within the Night: Behind My CBC Longlisted Poems

Last spring, and earlier, in the previous winter and fall, I wrote some poems about my brother. One came in the night, in a tent, camped on the rocky shore of the arm of Simonhouse Lake that leads into Second Cranberry as J. and I were pushing into wilderness on a canoe trip. The next […]

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Riding Lessons: Look Where You’re Headed

Last night, I got on a horse. A beautiful white mare named Rosie with grey speckles scattered across her coat. Step by step, I got her ready: laid the blanket on her wide back, set the saddle, cinched it (over and over because some horses, like Rosie, appreciate the game of puffing up their bellies […]

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I woke up this morning feeling lucky. J. brought me coffee in the gorgeous bird-bedecked mug he gave me a couple years ago and told me, Happy birthday. Whatever I’d been dreaming had left me with a good feeling, I suppose, because that’s what I felt, I felt happy, which, I’ll admit, has been kind-of […]

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So, things have been nuts. My mom came to visit, two days after the movers hauled everything into our new house. We picked her up at the airport and – you might already know this – when she got inside our front door and started climbing the stairs, she pretty much collapsed. Cue 911, and […]

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I’m on day seventeen of the Summer of 2017 Finish My Novel marathon and our next door neighbour decided yesterday that he or she needed to start their own marathon. Of jackhammering. This put an end to my quiet working time on the back deck. It even almost triggered me towards an Internet binge session […]

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Well, here we go: after four and a half years in the beautiful north, we are saying ‘see you later’ to The Pas. Last weekend, in the midst of packing boxes and preparations for our yard sale, J. got a call and, to make a long story short, early this week he was offered a […]

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Breaking Rules

Lately, I’ve been breaking rules. And not in a good way. I’ve been starting the day with my cellphone, looking at my email, scrolling through Facebook, clicking over to CBC or the Guardian to check out the news. Trump, suicide bombers, the traumatizing appropriation debate, residential school deniers, racism, rising Arctic seawater, and my own […]

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Poetry: What’s the Point?

It’s poetry month, and I’ve been doing NaPoWriMo (National Poetry Writing Month). Each morning, I grab my phone, check out the day’s prompt, ignore the prompt (usually) and then write a poem or three. Most of them are about my brother (big surprise) or somehow twist their way back to him, meaning, I suppose, that I’m working […]

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Happy Birthday, Bro

I woke at four this morning, and with night around me, the dark, quiet fields outside, I wrote for a little while. A couple of poems came out: one about the sleek black kitten who lives in the house we’re house-sitting on a hobby farm in Alberta, another to my brother whose birthday is today. […]

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Circles and Loops

Grief is not linear. It does not come in stages. It loops back, squiggles forward, circles and dips. Like everyone says (everyone who’s been there, I mean), it comes in waves. Buried in novel revisions, focused on creating, I’ve been doing okay. But then I hit send to deliver my manuscript to my agent, looked […]

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