January 19th, 2008 writerspice
Last May, in downtown Santiago de Chile, I found myself laughing my head off in a brightly-lit diner. It was around midnight and a few of us, gripped by hunger, had sauntered up the street from our hostel to find something to eat. Little did we know the menu would prove more entertaining than the sauce-slathered chicken sandwiches, spilling slabs of avocados (although that does sound pretty good right about now).
Without a camera, I couldn’t surreptitiously record the pages, nor did I want to insult the staff by stifling giggles as I asked for a copy. Instead, I committed a few of the jucier bits to memory and wrote them down in my journal back in my room.
Isn’t this one of more amusing aspects of travel? Finding English words twisted into phrases that are just so funny… In that diner last May, I laughed harder than I had in months. My three Hungarian friends eyed me, alarmed, probably afraid I’d soon slip into convulsions.
In reality, I simply couldn’t make up my mind between “meat for the poor thing” and a pork dish called “he she differs / he she cooks”.
It’s a shame that the Beijing Tourism Bureau is working so hard to wipe out “Chinglish” in time for the Olympics. Not only are these abstract little phrases amusing, they also provide some poetry. Anyone up for an “attache pan of mold?” Yum.
Posted in Contemplations, Just For Fun, World | 1 Comment »
December 6th, 2007 writerspice
A couple of odd bits of news from Miami, Florida popped into my in-box today, sent by TravelMole. Together, they summoned an image of that strange ocean-side world, so different from the wintry view out my window. How fun!
The first is a newly offered guarantee from Catalina Hotel & Beach Club. They’re promising a free indoor tanning session to any visiting tourist if it rains for more than two hours during “prime tanning hours.”
I’m sorry, but did you say prime tanning hours? Into my head popped an image of that cute little sun-bronzed Coppertop girl with the puppy dog pulling on her bathing suit, revealing a white bottom beneath. As in, uh, the 1980s. Forgive me, but I thought that decade was the last time anybody actually made an afternoon of lying under the sun.
But I suppose this is Miami Beach. And what do I know? I’ve only been there once, at the age of 13, in the backseat while my dad drove the family down the beach in our very uncool minivan. South Beach probably lay somewhere far to the south of us, but my sister and I were too busy looking for Sonny Crockett to care.
I wouldn’t mind going back – especially with all that Art Deco and Cuban flare. And with the hurricanes keeping their distance and winter continuing to pound the northern half of the continent, tourist season is looking up for Florida.
But for those who are about to make the ultimate trip, TravelMole and assorted media today reported on an interesting option.
In a sandy, barren area just off Miami, an artist-designed underwater city is being established by the Neptune Society. Set up to restore fish habitat and reestablish coral reef, the concrete lions, columns and other architectural features are also available as enclosed receptacles for anyone looking for a unique burial option for their ashes.
From guaranteed tanning to underwater burial in a recreated Atlantis. Fitting, in an odd sorta Florida way.
Photo by Mike Schinkel
Posted in Going Green, Just For Fun, United States | No Comments »
May 15th, 2007 writerspice
finally updating her blog! Lauren is excited. Lauren is giving her dog a cookie. Lauren is out in the garden, going to bed, packing, off on an adventure, back to work. Lauren is procrastinating.Â
For many of you the above claims might make no sense at all. But if you’ve been bitten by the Facebook bug, they’re probably ringing a few bells.
Yes, Lauren is a Facebook addict.
And, holy cow, no sooner did I become a Facebook addict than the world started talking about it. Or so it seemed. Although, sure, it is unlikely that people struggling somewhere to stay in their mud homes in the face of an ever-more-oppressive government are all that tuned in to Facebook and the recent controversy it has spawned.
But in my little North American universe, Lauren is hip! Â
Hip because, while I am part of the .1 percent of the population of Facebook users born in the 1970s and was actually begrudgingly introduced to it by my sister-in-law who was born in the 1980s, I am still part of it! On Mother’s Day, much to my mother’s annoyance, my sister (born in the 1960s!) and I spent a good chunk of time discussing our Facebooks. My husband napped. Her’s talked about a group he wants to start: people who have lost their partners to Facebook.
Seriously, Lauren has is having a problem. Her sister is, too.
The pressing difficulty for me is not so much stumbling across bitchy comments by teenie-boppers in group forums, an issue that has hit the news big-time over the past little while and which I’ll get to later. The issue, for me, runs a bit deeper. It goes like this:
Lauren is her own boss. Lauren is not going to make any money if she is on her Facebook every ten seconds changing her status and uploading new pictures and cruising around to see what all her friends are doing like some manic partier who can’t sit still. Like all classic addicts, Lauren is out of control.    Â
And what a strange thing this is. Sometimes, late at night, as I’m lying in bed thinking of clever things to write on people’s walls, I will wonder if anyone actually cares that I am going to bed, eating breakfast, bringing my dog out for a walk, taking a shower, contemplating ladybugs. But still the compulsion is too much. I must keep everyone in the know. Â
Because I, like everyone else, want to be part of something. And despite the fact that I just came back from a worldwide gathering of 6,000 people talking about reconciliation with their pasts and building meaning in their lives, despite the fact that I really am part of a deep, meaningful movement that is making a true impact in the world, I still feel a thrill when I update my status. Â
How weird is that?
For me, it emphasizes how different it is for teenagers these days. The 99.9 percent of Facebook users who were born after the 70s have more or less grown up in this other world of online communities.
And how funny it is that the answer that adults have for kids saying mean things online is to try and ban the medium.
As we all know, say it with me, the medium isn’t… Yeah, yeah.Â
The simple truth is this: as technology races ever faster, the world changes more and more. We hit 30 and start shaking our heads at the teenagers around us (a fact that reinforced how hip I felt to be doing something so youngsterish!)
But a different – and, yeah, worse – world doesn’t automatically equal apocalypse. What is scary right now, with teenagers spending more time in Second Life than the real world and using Facebook to bully and be mean, are actually the same things that have always been scary: violence and meaninglessness and isolation. We need to find an answer for these things, not the way they might be expressed.
Lauren is done. She is going to check on her friends. Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â
Posted in Just For Fun | 5 Comments »
April 18th, 2007 writerspice
One of my first major publications was a piece for the Globe and Mail’s Facts and Arguments section. It was an essay about diving dumpsters - specifically the one behind the supermarket near my house. We were finding food, all kinds of it: loaf after loaf of delicatessan-style bread, pounds of butter, lots of veggies, and even, one day, a mushroom lasagna.
Dumpster diving is still a way of life for many and I commend them for it, but I’ve hung up the habit. These days instead of looking for second-hand food (I mean, really, how easy is it to find organic carrots and tahini tossed out?), I hit the thrift stores for second-hand treasures.
The latest trips I’ve taken to the Goodwill across town have opened up a whole new interest – oddly, in ceramics. First, there were the mushroom salt and pepper shakers that I couldn’t resist:
After that, it was love at first site with this thing… I mean, really, does this objet d’art not whisper some story about free love and hallucinations of diamond-studded skies? And not only is it adorable, it’s also a piggy bank!
One man’s junk is another man’s treasure, they say. I’m not a man, but I sure know what they mean. This pleasingly-retro item was made using a mold, my potter sister-in-law informed me. She was there when I squeeled in delight upon spotting it. And it wasn’t created anonymously. In fact, Vince crafted it in 1974, as the scrawled signature on the bottom attests.
And now, in keeping with the great cycle of discard and claim, it’s mine. It’s your turn: what was your greatest second-hand find? (answer by clicking Comments at the top)   Â
Posted in Just For Fun | 8 Comments »
